The Family History

My grandfather Will Stone was a radical Jewish labor organizer of the sort that got investigated by the FBI for all sorts of things, some of which he did, and many of which he didn’t. I know he tried to sign up for the Abraham Lincoln brigades in the Spanish Civil War, but I don’t know if he went. I know that he was an avowed Communist, well after Bob Hope had dropped the “noble Russian Bear” line from “Thanks for the Memory,” when it should have been obvious to everyone that Stalin was not the kindly “Uncle Joe” pictured with the allies at Yalta.

I know that some time around 1948 he left my grandmother and my father alone in New Jersey, and that my father didn’t hear from him for twenty-some-odd years. I don’t know what it was like to be a godless Communist divorced single mother in the 1950s, but it cannot have been easy.

I know that my biological grandfather later claimed he had not written or sent money in order to protect the family, because he was being investigated and followed. I don’t know how many of those anti-Communist forces were real and how many were imaginary, but I imagine it was some of each. I don’t know how much his siblings agreed with his politics, but I don’t think it was much. I never met him and I don’t know when he died.

I learned all of this just last weekend, at my second cousin’s bat mitzvah. I’d never met anyone from his side of the family before. The only two people of my grandfather’s generation in attendance were his youngest brother Sam, with his wife. Sam told me the story about the Spanish Civil War, and said that my father looked just like Will. Sam’s wife told me that Will had never been an easy one to get along with, that his preaching about labor rights seemed cultish and his preaching about women’s rights hypocritical. She also told me she once went on a date with my great-uncle Paul, way back in New York when dinosaurs and Studebakers roamed the earth. She and Sam both remembered my grandmother fondly.

Sam had been my grandmother’s favorite of her half-dozen brothers-in-law, but I doubt they had spoken since the divorce (that’d be nearly sixty years, if you’re counting). My dad called and put her on the phone with him and they talked for a few minutes. Then we all had cake and promised to keep in touch.

Stats, or, who the hell still reads this thing?

Well, traffic is down this month. Stats suggest that people want to find things about cute monkeys and also this particular white English Bull Terrier puppy.

I’d hoped that people would read this site for my pithy commentary on the nature of marketing and advertising or something.

Hint: want cuteness? Go to Cute Overload. They have all the cuteness you could possibly desire. The captions are annoying and twee, but the photos are really incredible.

Once again, the name data is released

U.S. Baby name data was updated on May 12 and there’s been a predictable uptick (I want to say “flood” but it’s not that many) in baby-name news stories. My favorite so far is also one of the most emailed NYT stories, and the headline is: And if it’s a boy, will it be Lleh?, about people naming their daughters Nevaeh: heaven spelled backward.

Equally funny but not baby-related is this list of aptronyms, names which coincidentally describe the jobs people have, starting with, of course, Wayne Schmuck, an unscrupulous used-car dealer.

World Beard and Moustache Championships: Holy Crap

Looking through Flickr’s interesting pictures I came across an incredible portrait labeled “World Beard and Mustache Championships.”

What, I asked, is this championship?

Only the most insanely awesome mustache (or moustache, if you insist) and beard related event ever.

Obviously, facial hair has replaced real estate as the primary subject of this blog. Hope that’s OK with both my readers.

DTMFA

People in the Times are horrible: “[The East Hampton broker] described the frustrated wife, shopping for a $3 million summer home, who turned to her husband and uttered one line that said it all: ‘I wish you had a good job so we didn’t have to live like this.'”

DTMFA, dude. Seriously.

Pleasing Nobody

Bush’s immigration speech seems to have pleased nobody. The right thinks it’s not tough enough, and the left thinks it’s a militarization of the border. Even Hindrocket of Pajamas Media doesn’t like it.

But honestly, it’s perhaps the sole reasonable thing he’s said in about forever. It isn’t actually feasible to deport every illegal immigrant. We’re going to have to face up to people wanting to come to the US, and we’re going to need some kind of legal program to bring them into the fold, and give them a path to citizenship. To stop people from being exploited and to stop wages from being depressed, we need to punish companies who hire undocumented workers. And yeah, we should probably put some more enforcement staff on the border– although the national guard is almost certainly terrible idea.

Anyway, it’s a harsh welcome to reality for Dubya: he’s squandered all his goodwill, and now, no matter what he does, nobody is going to trust or believe him.

I have rarely been so happy to say I told you so.